I arrived in Kramatorsk in April to blooming apricot trees. Now, in September, this city on the advancing front lines of eastern Ukraine stands dressed in autumnal colors. Some days, the grape leaves turning crimson catch my attention before I notice that another building has been destroyed during the night. What’s impossible not to notice is how the city is dying–the streets are emptier, the parks deserted, the homes abandoned. In any other war, all of the newspapers would be writing about Kramatorsk, but this war has been going on too long, and everyone is tired.
I stay here to do volunteer work, helping with civilian evacuations. In my free time, I study Chinese, write, and give perfume seminars online. If you follow me on Substack, you also know that I have rescued a kitten, and now my teaching assistant is present whenever we talk about accords and notes.
Some of the articles you might find interesting about my life:
I also started a series on perfume study, based on only 10 materials. Later, we will expand our palette and learn how to work with other ingredients:
Perfume Lesson 6: Fall in Love with Clary Sage
Perfume Lesson 5: Lavender Master Class
I also have a series to deconstruct iconic fragrances:
The Anatomy of an Icon: Diorissimo
The Anatomy of an Icon: Christian Dior Eau Sauvage
And since I still wear perfume, I write perfume reviews:
Chloé Cedrus Intense Perfume Review
Our “Recommend Me a Perfume” thread is open this week. You can use this space to find perfume recommendations, to share your discoveries and favorite scents, and to ask any questions about scents, aromas and flavors. Or you can just tell us what perfume you are wearing. If you received recommendations from this thread, please let us know what you sampled.
How does it work: 1. Please post your requests or questions as comments here. You can also use this space to ask any fragrance related questions. To receive recommendations that are better tailored to your tastes, you can include details on what you like and don’t like, your signature perfumes, and your budget. And please let us know what you end up sampling. 2. Then please check the thread to see if there are other requests you can answer. Your responses are really valuable for navigating the big and sometimes confusing world of perfume, so let’s help each other!
To make this thread easier to read, when you reply to someone, please click on the blue “reply” link under their comment.
Photography by Bois de Jasmin
31 Comments
mia: demon dancer by ex nihilo! bright+ addictive dry down, unique September 7, 2026 at 9:24am
Mark Valetutto: Mia, you’ve piqued my curiosity! I haven’t tried Demon Dancer yet, but the rhubarb, blood orange and peppermint sound intriguing. Does that brightness stay through the drydown, or does it become warmer and woodier? I’d love to know what makes it so addictive for you. September 7, 2026 at 10:43am
Mark Valetutto: Victoria, today I’m wearing Ruby by Kajal for the first time, and it has taken me somewhere wonderful: back to the confectionery stores of my childhood.
Its combination of fruity sweetness, almond, creamy notes and vanilla brings back the whole experience—seeing the colorful treats, smelling them together, choosing something new, then tasting and enjoying it. Most vividly, I remember the pleasure of being treated by an adult and how special that made me feel.
What surprised me was how completely the feeling returned. I could almost feel that childhood anticipation again. The fragrance seemed to unlock a memory in which sight, smell, taste and affection were all stored together.
As someone who composes fragrances, I find that fascinating. We can build a sweet accord, but the wearer’s own history gives it emotional meaning. For me, Ruby smells like being treated. I was back in that confectionery store.
Has a perfume ever brought back an entire childhood experience for anyone else?
Mark Angelo Valitutti September 7, 2026 at 10:34am
Aurora: Hi Mark, Very glad for you that the perfume conjured such a vivid and happy memory.
I remember smelling APdlfd’o Neroli Blanc for the first time and immediately remembering my first experience of tasting middle Eastern pastries as a child at the Paris mosque tearoom. The orange blossom aroma was so distinctive and as a Parisian kid I had never smelled the flower. Alas NB is no longer made (but I have a large bottle) in their wisdom the house only kept the intense, so much less distinctive to my nose and too sweet but the original may have been more divisive. September 10, 2026 at 9:08am
Esther H Cohn: I kept reading about Guerlain Vanille Planifolia
Extrait 21. I bought a very expensive tiny sample and do love it. Is it really worth $660 a bottle? The reviews are all spectacular. September 7, 2026 at 10:37am
adva ben yakar darhy: i think the iris and the tonka are way better in the extrait version, not sure the vanilla worth the price. September 7, 2026 at 2:26pm
Ana: If the sample felt special but you’re unsure, I’d compare before committing. Guerlain Spiritueuse Double Vanille is a richer, boozier vanilla with more warmth; Maison Mataha Escapade Gourmande gives a dense pastry-like vanilla; and Indult Tihota is a clean, focused vanilla if what you love is the creamy center. Vanille Planifolia Extrait 21 is worth $660 only if its darker nuance and exclusivity matter to you—no vanilla at that price is a blind-buy value. I’d wear the sample several times and test those three first. September 25, 2026 at 1:56am
Kaisa: In my opinion, no. I find SDV more interesting and there are sooo many other vanillas out there that cost a fraction of the extra it… I’d advise sampling around first. October 15, 2026 at 3:34pm
adva ben yakar darhy: today i wore a sample of memo menorca and felt like i did laundry all day September 7, 2026 at 2:31pm
Susan: I recently discovered the new Guerlain Eau de Tulle. It is incredibly lovely and “reasonably” priced by today’s standards. My understanding is that it came out of Guerlain’s Le Plus Beau Jour de Ma Vie – which is gorgeous and prohibitively expensive – and then Guerlain’s L’Heure de Nuit, which I also adore and which is also quite expensive. I don’t entirely understand the connection between all of them – and I am hopeless at describing fragrances (I just either like them or not) – but Eau de Tulle is worth trying if you are into warm, feminine fragrances. September 7, 2026 at 4:16pm
Kaisa: Yes, Eau de Tulle is the same perfume as Le Plus Beau… (which was the same as Bouquet de la Mariée, very confusing!) Interesting that you find it similar to L’Heure de Nuit. I loved that but it was too €€€… October 15, 2026 at 3:39pm
Iya: Hello everyone,
Perhaps someone here knows what I am about to ask…
Today I smelled a gorgeous perfume on a lady in a shop. The sillage was big enough that I first smelled it in the air and then had to follow my nose to the scent owner.
I gelt like I was inhaling lily of the valley – floral, bright, slightly on the dryer side…
The lady told me it was De Marly and then she added Ye Ye. I did not want to bother her any further and did not specify which one. And it is possible she might have not wanted to give away her perfume. I know those are 2 different companies, and I don’t remember anything in De Marly that smelled of lilies of the valley, although I am not familiar with anything they released in the last 5 years.
Does it ring the bell for anyone at all? I know it’s a long shot. I appreciate any advice. September 7, 2026 at 9:20pm
Caroline: Could be Parfums de Marly’s Meliora:
top notes: black currant, red berries, cassis, raspberry and orange blossom; middle notes:
rose, lily of the valley, and ylang ylang; base notes are musk, vanilla, almond and woody notes. Haven’t smelled it, but noticed the lotv
listed on Fragrantica. September 7, 2026 at 9:53pm
penelope: could it be Valaya?it has orange blossom and white flowers or Delina? September 8, 2026 at 2:05pm
Ana: For a lily-of-the-valley / Ye Ye–adjacent ID in the De Marly orbit, think green-floral with a soft creamy base rather than sharp muguet soliflores—compare side by side on skin for a full dry-down because LotV notes often morph. If you can share which De Marly you’ve tried and liked, narrowing gets easier. September 29, 2026 at 2:05am
penelope: could it be Valaya?it has orange blossom and white flowers or Delina? September 8, 2026 at 2:04pm
Rachel: Can anyone recommend a scent like Costes that lasts? I like Costes very much but only lasts 30 minutes on me. September 8, 2026 at 9:13pm
Aurora: Hi Rachel: Heard of Costes but never tried it, from reading on Fragrantica and Parfumo it seems to bear some resemblance to Diptyque l’Eau because sharing several spices, I can vouch that l’Eau is quite potent and lasts well. September 10, 2026 at 2:02pm
Rachel: Thank you! On a whim o bought a Xerjoff scent Alexandria II. I haven’t smelled it yet a blind buy which never ends well for me. I liked the review that I saw saying it had apple vanilla and Lily of the valley it sounded interesting.🤞 September 10, 2026 at 3:38pm
Aurora: You’re very welcome Rachel😀. Your new Xerjoff sounds pretty, I have a little 15ml of Starlight and like it. September 11, 2026 at 3:14am
Rachel: Would you be able to recommend a hair perfume that smells special? I don’t like to wash my dry frizzy hair everyday and would love for a light not too sweet smelling scent that goes well with not perfectly clean hair. September 13, 2026 at 9:00am
Aurora: Hi Rachel: I remember Byredo has Bal d’Afrique as a hair perfume. I always liked Bd’A and it’s not too sweet, perhaps it might suit you? It’s also much less expensive than their regular perfumes. I believe Frédéric Malle has hair products. I’ve read positive reviews of them and friends on a blog I read like them but they’re pricey. September 14, 2026 at 3:43am
Ana: For a light hair scent that won’t turn sugary over dry, frizzy hair, I’d try Byredo Bal d’Afrique Hair Perfume (citrusy neroli/marigold over airy woods), Diptyque Eau Rose Hair Mist (fresh rose rather than syrup), or Chanel Chance Eau Tendre Hair Mist (sheer grapefruit/quince and musk). I’d mist a brush or the mid-lengths instead of the scalp, then see how each behaves on hair that isn’t freshly washed. October 1, 2026 at 1:59am
Ana: Rachel, if you love the peppery incense of Costes, Comme des Garçons Kyoto is worth sampling for a similar dry, airy incense with noticeably better staying power. Etro Messe de Minuit goes darker and more resinous but lasts for hours, and Hermès Poivre Samarcande keeps the pepper front and centre over a woody base. I’d test each on skin for a full day to see which holds closest to the Costes mood on you. October 6, 2026 at 2:00am
Nancy Chan: Today, I wore Marseille EDT, by Comme des Garçon. It’s a beautiful clean fresh soapy smell of orange blossom laundry powder. This makes it suitable for the summer heatwave. For me it makes a change from the citrus perfumes which I usually prefer for summer. September 10, 2026 at 1:39pm
Katie: Today I am wearing Chanel Beige EDP which is one of my favorite everyday fragrances. I am currently looking for an exquisite rose perfume and will take any recommendations. I like a rich and heady rose. Cost isn’t a problem – I just want a rose perfume that uses an absurd amount of rose oil. I find many of them to be too weak. To give an example, one of my favorites is Frederic Malle Une Rose. September 12, 2026 at 8:25pm
Aurora: Hello Katie: I adore rose perfumes, and never seem to have enough😀. My headiest, richest, most natural rose is Perris Monte Carlo Rose de Taif extrait. I waited a long time after I used my sample to finally get a bottle last month. I found a 90% full bottle on the secondary market for 50% off. IMO it’s expensive but worth it. Perhaps read and research it and try a sample. Good luck in your quest, hope you will get more recommendations. September 14, 2026 at 3:53am
Ana: If Une Rose already feels right but you want even more rose oil weight, three that stay rich rather than watery: Frederic Malle Portrait of a Lady (rose loaded over patchouli and incense, lasts), Guerlain Nahema (a peachy, almost jammy rose that reads heady rather than polite), and Amouage Lyric Woman (rose with spices and incense, dense but still floral). Sample Portrait of a Lady first if you want the closest “absurd amount of rose” feeling next to Une Rose; Nahema if you want it sweeter and more retro. September 28, 2026 at 2:06am
carole: I love all of Ana’s suggestions, and I’ll add SL Fille de Berlin, which is almost jammy sweet red raspberry rose. The Goutal Paris line also has some great roses-Rose Splendide and Rose Absolu. Ce Soir ou Jamais, which is rich roses and wine.The FM Un Rose is also available as a parfum and it’s gorgeous! October 12, 2026 at 8:53am
VisionScents: Rachel, airy peppery-incense scents like Costes often fade fast on skin, so one easy trick is to spray a little on a scarf or jacket collar, where those light spice and incense notes can hang around for hours. If you want the same smoky, church-incense mood with more staying power, Comme des Garçons Avignon or Heeley Cardinal are worth sampling side by side with it. Applying over an unscented moisturizer also helps a lot with sheer compositions. In South Florida heat and humidity we see these sheer spicy scents disappear quickly on a lot of our North Miami customers, so fabric application is usually the first thing I suggest. Disclosure: I’m the owner of VisionScents, a fragrance shop in North Miami. October 5, 2026 at 3:30pm
Kayali Vanilla 28: Hello everyone, I’m looking for a cozy fall vanilla that isn’t too sweet — something warm and enveloping for crisp evenings, but with enough depth to avoid smelling like a candle. I love the idea of vanilla paired with woods or soft spices. Does anyone have a favorite that fits the bill? October 18, 2026 at 5:52am